Over the last five years, I’ve personally had the opportunity to speak with at least five hundred funeral directors, and countless funeral home staffers. And I’ve attended a few funerals. So I can tell you in general terms what to expect when you meet a funeral director. Funeral directors, for the most part, operate businesses that in many ways might first remind you of a sort of bureaucracy, and subsequently resemble a local ministry. Their lives and lifestyles are caught up in their profession, and they know the extent of the details that must be addressed. Funeral directors are educated, trained and licensed. Their attention to detail is almost always above average, as is their ability and willingness to listen and understand.
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Unlike most major purchases we make, we don’t really know in advance of the planning what the arrangements we want will cost. A funeral director and his or her staff can guide you through these difficult times, and you’ll be in a better position to let him or her guide you if you know what to expect. Pre-planning takes a lot of the “sticker shock” out of the ordeal, but if that is not possible, you can help yourself by speaking frankly about your budget. The average cost of a funeral over the last decade has been more than $6,000. Although like any purchase, a funeral or cremation service can have a wide price range, depending upon your requirements.
When you visit a funeral home the first time, bring someone whose opinion you value, preferably a family member. If you’re not sure about a certain provider, it’s not a bad idea to take the general price list home for review. If you have concerns about the way a funeral director offers to handle your case, it’s not a bad idea to visit another home and compare. Chemistry is an important part of the intangible benefit you should derive from the relationship you develop with your funeral director; if it’s not there, don’t be afraid to keep looking. You’ll know the right course of action when you find it.
The following questions and answers are provided by Dan Redmond, Cemetery and
Funeral Inspector, California Department of Consumer Affairs, in a series of
video interviews.
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What is a "funeral director"?
A funeral director is a professional who arranges and facilitates a funeral. They also actually direct a funeral to make sure everything goes through for you in a manner that you want to see the funeral happen. They facilitate any music, any special arrangements, any religious observances. They take care of all that for you to make sure that it's all done in a very professional and orderly manner.
What training and qualifications does a funeral director have?
The training and qualifications of funeral directors vary from state to state. There are some states that don't require funeral directors to have any training at all. Here in California, however, you have to have an associates degree in any subject. You must take and pass a funeral directors examination, and then be finger printed to make sure your background is clear of any criminal doings with regard to the industry, and then you are issued a license.
What qualities should I be looking for in a funeral director?
The qualities you should be looking for in a funeral director, firstly, is that you feel comfortable with them. You want a funeral director who you can connect and talk with, and who understands what your needs are. The other thing is I would look at is the longevity of the funeral director that you're going to. Make sure that they've been in the community a long time. You can also check with government agencies to make sure that they are a licensed funeral director, they are in good standing and that they have provided good service in the past.
What questions should I ask a funeral director?
The kind of questions you should ask when choosing a funeral director are: what types of services they provide, whether or not they can accommodate your needs and your religious observances if you have any, and what costs there are. Shopping around for a funeral director is really something most people don't think about doing, because it's at that time of need when they're really grieving and they're not thinking very clearly. However, if you can, it's really good to shop around to see what kind of funeral director you want to have work on your family's service.
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